I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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