I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
We have started to decorate penises.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Randomize
