Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
