Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
My breasts were aching with rage.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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