We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Randomize
