Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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