Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize