High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Are we still banned from the library?
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Randomize
