D3 body, D1 cock
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
Randomize
