If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
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