ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Randomize
