just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Dick very happy bro
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
