Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
