Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Randomize
