This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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