Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Dude, this chick just tossed my salad hard. All that I could picture was a dog trying to get the last of the peanut butter out of the jar of Jiff and trying not to think of how grotesque my last dump was.
Then she tried to kiss me and I wouldn't and she got pissed off and went to sleep. Then about an hour later, her kid called her. She went home and on the way out I told her to wash her mouth before she kissed her kid good night. Weird night..
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
