I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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