I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
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