the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
We are two peas in an std pod
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
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