Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
organizing the empties. That sober.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Randomize
