she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
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