sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Randomize
