i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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