Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
Randomize