So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
