i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
he fucked my hip out of place.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
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