I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
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I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
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