Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
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