He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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