So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
i just sent this text using only my big toe
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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