I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Randomize