I'm drive I can fine osifer
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
Randomize
