I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
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