He kissed a someone with a penis
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Holy shit dude........stairs
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize
