$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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