i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
operation harelip BJ is a go
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
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