If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
