Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
