Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
