AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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