He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
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