i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Randomize
