Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Randomize