you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
