i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Randomize
