flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
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