conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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