There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Randomize
