A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
