it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
