In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Its about making memories worth repressing
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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