So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
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THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
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jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n